And so it came to pass that the dawn of the day of my Graduation from Obedience School found me bright-eyed, and well-rested, and bushy-tailed, all from sleeping soundly on the Human Bed, which is exceeding in comfort. Furthermore, on this shining morning, I could tell Something Was Up, which got me hyper, and thusly my rocket-powered, Hairy Bullet behavior was indeed something to behold!
Finding that I could leap over the back of the couch and clear it quite nicely, I continued forth, wrecking the house, tearing the area rugs up from their sticky backsides, and smiting over books and a lamp with mighty wags of my tail. Much jumping and snarling ensued during this short period of mayhem.
Mistress and Young Master were taken back at the ferocity with which I shredded some papers that the devil Printer spat out, and I bolted up the staircase with the confetti of such papers dribbling from my jaws.
I did hear, dimly in the back of my mind, the words, “NO!” and, “STOP!” and, “MAGGIE, EASY!” being shouted forthwith. However, these cries only made me pump my furry legs harder to the chase.
I crashed down the stairs and leaped at Mistress with all my might and strength, trying to include her in the game. All in the name of Play, just Play! But Mistress looked at the wanton destruction and did not want to Play in this manner. Indeed, she spake harshly and called me a miserable and wretched creature amongst all the beasts who go upon four paws. Thus, I found myself prisoner in the Crate once again, and this time, with no blanket. Mistress and Young Master were most disappointed in my reckless behavior.
After a time, my Mistress opened up the Crate and Gave Me A Look. I knowest that look, truly I do! Slowly I climbed back up the stairs, to where Young Master had ensconced himself in his chambers. I lay down at the door and whined for his company. “Perhaps if you did not always steal his Legos and socks, he wouldn’t shut his door!” Mistress said tartly. Shamed, I buried my nose deep in the stale carpet Mistress wishes to replace and heaved a great sigh of sadness.
At great length, Young Master opened the door and emerged, and I was overjoyed by his presence. Thereupon, we journeyed hence to yonder Obedience School for the Final Class and Graduation, with me feeling much chastised, and verily, a lot calmer.
– The End (??)