News!

Did I tell you the news?

Jamie took my crate downstairs and locked it away in the storage room in the basement. Do you realize what this means?! No More Crate! Oh, happy day! Mom says I have been good when left to my own devices at home, and she doesn’t feel the need to crate me any more. See, kids? Good behavior pays off!

In other news…

Mom took me out for a trot in the yard to do some business. When we got up to the hill in the backyard, she noticed something furry on the ground. I raised all my hair and crouched, sniffing defensively.

Mom didn’t have her contacts in, and peered nearsightedly at the object. Quickly, I did my duty and Mom came charging into the house, telling Dad, “There’s something dead outside and I am not cleaning it up. You’re going to have to take a shovel and garbage bag and dispose of the body.”

Now, Mom gets all the glamorous jobs, like picking up my poop, giving me baths, and cleaning the mud from my toes. Dad was going to object, but one look at Mom’s face and he silently went out to the garage to get what he needed. He was gone for a while, and I watched him carrying the garbage bag – with an obvious bulge – to the outside can.

Dad came in the kitchen with a look of relief on his face. “What was it?” Mom asked, anxiously. “It was somebody’s fur collar, or part of a fur coat,” Dad explained. “An animal must have gotten it from someone’s property, and brought it in to our yard to eat, thinking it had gotten the mother load – only to find that they’d been fooled.” “That’s still gross, but thank goodness is wasn’t a full body,” Mom said.

Thank goodness, indeed!

Woof! Love, Maggie

12 thoughts on “News!

  1. Pingback: Mink Stole – Old School | Contrafactual

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